Wednesday, April 1, 2009

Teen girls trading sex for favours

Source: Edmonton Sun

Somewhere in the city, children as young as 11 and 12 are gathering in basements and playing intricate, graphic sex games.

I first heard about these parties a few years ago from my 12-year-old daughter, who said kids at her school played games where each girl had to perform oral sex on several boys.

Naively, I dismissed the story as another urban myth, like Pop Rocks causing heart attacks and maggots in milk-shake machines.

Turns out, these parties are very real and frighteningly commonplace.

Edmonton is featured in a new book and documentary DVD called Oral Sex is the New Goodnight Kiss by Sharlene Azam, where she explores "the growing phenomenon of middle-class girls trading sex for money, drugs and luxury goods."

If the girls wanted money, they'd call a man named Luu Chi Dang and tell him that they wanted to work.

He'd pick them up and take them to one of three homes, where a dozen or so middle-aged men were waiting.

For each man the girls had sex with, they'd be paid $60. Dang got $40.

Said one girl: "I just had to lie there. The lights would always be off, and the few times it bothered me I would think that I could go get Boston Pizza after or something. The best part was getting paid. I did it for the money. It took 15 minutes and I would have $500."

Azam described Dang as a "really nice guy, very polite and deferential." He never recruited anyone. The girls took care of that.

"Most of the girls said they wanted to make money to go shopping. When their friends saw them shopping they would tell them, 'If you want to make money contact Luu' and I would hook it up," he told her.

Azam offers advice for parents who fear their girls are being sucked in. It's all common-sense stuff, like communicating, spending time with them and building up their esteem. She also reminds adults that they have a job to do.

"Don't be afraid to assert your authority... your daughter might not thank you for keeping track of her whereabouts, but it does not matter," she says. Azam adds: "The biggest problem is that parents aren't worried enough."

Exactly, where are the parents? And how can parents not know what's going on with their daughters. My mom always knows what's going on with me no matter how much I try to hide it. When I started to see a boy in High School, my mom knew immediately even before she met him. I just acted different. When I lost my virginity in University, my mom questioned me even before she knew I had a bf, "you been having sex haven't you, I can tell by your figure". Later in University, I got into a bit of trouble with gambling and poker (from a bad boyfriend) and my mom, who knows nothing about poker, knew I was gambling cause I looked suspicious around the house and whenever someone mentioned money, I'd jump. Moms know EVERYTHING! These kids either have moms who don't care or don't have moms at all.


Parton Words said...

As a father of 3 girls that frightens the hell out of me, even though I'm in Australia.

Thanks for sharing.

Bangkok Blogger said...

Unfortunately this happens the world over, some places more openly than others. I have seen teenagers come to work in bars in Bangkok wearing old clothes and flip flops.

Inside a week they are parading outside their bar with the latest mobile phone, new hair style, new clothes and makeup. The transformation is quite amazing.

As I live in Bangkok I have got to know a few of them. They are so happy that they make more money than they have ever dreamed about.

Their attitude is that they would be having sex with men in their villages and getting nothing for it, except a baby. But 'at work' in Bangkok they are doing the same thing but getting a lot of money for it.

In one way I can understand it as they can make in 1 day what it takes 2 months to earn on a farm or factory.

Roger Williams said...

This carries the whiff of moral panic to me.

Degenerasian said...

Bangkok Blogger:

I can understand the situtation on Thailand when a 'farmer's daughter' is sold into prostitution or the girl is not educated and decides she wants money and the city lights.

But Edmonton's one of the largest cities in Canada. I would suspect these girls are in school and living at home. What the heck do you need so much money at 12 years old for?

Sharlene Azam said...

Hi, I think your comment about the parents not caring (at least enough) is accurate. When I interviewed the girls and their mothers, I learned that their moms did notice the appearance of new clothes, piercings, shoes, and yet they did not always ask for an explanation. Lauren, 15, told her mom "I found $450 behind Starbucks" and that was enough. Sometimes parents accept these lies out of fear. What do you do when you learn your daughter has traded her virginity for $1000? These are middle class parents who are hoping their daughters are going through a phase. Thanks for letting me post. Sharlene Azam I've included the url for my book:

Degenerasian said...

Sharlene Azam:

Yes, that is what amazes me the most is that things like new clothes and shoes not noticeable by mom. My mom knew everything single article of clothes and went shopping with me. I would go shopping with friends too but if anything I bought was not approved by mom it would be banned. Also at 15 I didn't work so I didn't have a penny. I had to ask mom for anything and everything.

I really look forward to the book!

Bangkok Blogger said...


Its not just farmers daughters that are at it in Thailand. But of course they are in the majority.

University students are well represented, as are girls that work in respectable jobs in the day, and engage in 'pay for play' in the evening.

They all think that getting paid for what they would normally do for free is a better idea !